Pablo’s birthday is in March. He shared his birthday with the husband of a close friend of mine. I remember all of us doing brunch together to celebrate. It was lovely time but sadly, the memory has multiple emotions for me.
You see, my friend’s husband passed away a few years ago. He was a nice guy, a good husband and dedicated father.
The large church that held his funeral service was so full of people they spilled out into the hallways and onto the balcony.
The communal cup ran over with love and sorrow. My friend stood in front of the immense crowd, her grief on full display, bravely speaking about intimate moments that connected the two of them, as we all looked on connecting to her emotionally and to him spiritually.
I had always admired my friend for her drive, her high energy which brought with it, success and independence. After seeing the grace she displayed throughout her grieving journey, however, I was in awe of her strength and resilience.
Now on Pablo’s birthday, I celebrate his day with feelings of love and happiness but also remember my friend’s husband with fondness and think about my friend with admiration and sadness for her loss.
Experiencing multiple feelings at once is normal, each emotion tends to be a different intensity and if you allow yourself to feel them, without judgement and without acting on them, you can let the painful ones flow through you, and give yourself permission to focus on the pleasurable ones.
Have you ever felt happy and sad at the same time? Or experienced an emotion as bittersweet?
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